Alcohol Health Warnings

1. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an twat
2. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over & over again until you get a good kicking.
3. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish
4. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol may cause you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to ring them at 4 in the morning.
5. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary.
6. Warning: Consumption of Alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead
7. Warning. Consumption of Alcohol may cause the illusion that you are tougher, more handsome and smarter than some really big guy called Chuck.
8. Warning. Consumption of Alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
9. Warning. Consumption of Alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
10. Warning. Consumption of Alcohol may cause pregnancy.